Whether I was dreaming or awakening, I am not sure.
And then a second time, ‘So what of life?’
My consciousness was shifted to be sure and it was not lost on me that this was Christmas night.
‘Should I grab my pad and pen to record?’ I inquired.
‘So what of life?’ this silent gentle voice pondered, leaving the query hanging in the dark still silence of the night.
Like the student the circumstance had evoked with nothing else forthcoming I replied, ‘Perhaps as simple and complex as the sum of our days.’
Following some silence, ‘So what of the sum of our days?’ hung in the air.
In the next lapse of silence, feeling more awake than asleep, yet nevertheless in quite a dreamlike state, I realized that I had been invited into a Holy discussion to which withdrawal or retreat was not a considered option.
I struggle now to describe the sensation and the best I can bring forth is a great grandfather with too many greats preceding to count was curious about a child’s perspective (albeit in this instant an ‘old boy child’) about something long ago experienced to this infinite wisdom that only wonderment and curiosity remained.
‘The sum of our days,’ I proposed, ‘might be nothing more than someone’s calculation about how each of those days has been used and experienced.’
I could feel myself being drawn into some amazing and incredible time-warp. The smaller the increment of time, the more vast the space.
‘So what about our days?’
I wish there were words to describe this voice. I have been trying since my first encounter in 1998. In absolute silence and darkness each word seemed to fill the room with crystal clear clarity and with this no sensation of the experience of mortal sound or hearing. I was also becoming aware of a sense of complete acceptance.
‘Perhaps our days are best described as seemingly infinite moments of doing and not-doing,’ I offered more in the tone of a question than some sense of knowing.
As I pondered my own answer to the question that was allowed room to breathe, I had the very unique sensation that time and space was being unplugged. What only a few minutes before was about a ‘life’ was now about a ‘moment’ and the smaller increment seemed more vast and vital than the larger.
‘So what about our moments?’
I was becoming more aware of the inclusive nature of the questions. If this was continuing in a dream-state, it was more alive than being awake. If time and space had been unplugged, the personal energy my mind, body, and soul were generating was at high voltage.
‘From what I have been able to discover our moments are those fleeting instants that become the seeds of our creations. They are in a literal nano-second our choices and decisions of thought, word, and action that are let loose in our daily lives, the lives of others, the universe, and the cosmos. What wondrous mystery is your creation!’
Once again these words hung in the air unfettered in this silent night.
I tossed and turned lingering in those last comments, now anxious for the conversation to continue. Waiting for what happened next was no less amazing than the foregoing.
I was enveloped in a sense of peace, confidence, and optimism and there were no words – only a silence filled with blissful comfort.
All that I have shared occurred in about thirty minutes.
Sitting at my desk with the first sip of coffee, I looked at the clock.